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Men’s Soccer Players Need to Grow a Pair of Ovaries
The “beautiful game” is marred by their disgraceful histrionics
In the television show The Magicians, the character Margo is frustrated by the lack of courage and resolve she sees in the men around her. So she decides to flip the script. Instead of telling her male subordinates to “man up,” she tells them to “ovary up.” “You are not gonna cock out on me,” she tells her friend Elliot. “I would have said ‘pussy’ but let’s be honest, which one is stronger?”
I was thinking about Margo recently while watching the World Cup. They call soccer the “beautiful game,” but it’s hard to appreciate the beauty with so many players flopping around like fish, hoping to dupe an official into handing out yellow cards to their opponents, or even awarding a penalty kick.
Men’s soccer players could take a lesson from their female counterparts. You just don’t see this level of deceitful (and disgraceful) play-acting in the women’s game. Maybe that’s because women feel like they have to prove their toughness. Maybe because in the countries that dominate the women’s game — like the U.S. and China — such histrionics are deemed dishonorable.
Whatever the reason, female players are making the men look like a bunch of whiny crybabies. Have they no pride? And what, if…